This is my favorite principle of the book. I have seen way too many people focus on transactions in the business world instead of building relationships. What is the difference between a giver and a taker? As Adam Grants put it in his article “In the Company of Givers and Takers,” “When they act like givers, they contribute to others without seeking anything in return. They might offer assistance, share knowledge, or make valuable introductions. When they act like takers, they try to get other people to serve their ends while carefully guarding their own expertise and time.” Usually, people ask themselves unconsciously, “What is in it for me?” Or, as an acquaintance mentioned to me, “The hard part is where to focus, how to make sure my giving is creating an impact, how to deal with people who only take and never give.” This person is correct; as of today, only a quarter of the workforce are givers (Grant, 2013), making it very hard to give when most people aren’t. It is straightforward; when people only give something to others when they are sure they will get something in return, they behave selfishly. If we know we can be helpful and don’t do it because they think this person is a taker, then we don’t change the more significant systemic problem: Everyone is focused on themselves. In the multistakeholder economy we live in today, more people should go from ego to echo and move away from being focused on themselves, starting focusing on the networks that share the same intentions. We should be focusing on building relationships.
Grant, Adam. “In the Company of Givers and Takers.” Harvard Business Review, April 2013.
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